In our most recent teleclass, we heard from two students who met at one of our workshops and eventually fell in love. It wasn’t love at first sight for either of them, however. Rather, what eventually brought them together was patience, knowing, attraction, determination, and surrender.

One of the most common things people want to attract into their life through this work is a partner. But whether we’re trying to attract a person, a place, or a thing, we’re still operating within the same system of truth. Let’s review this system.

• No matter what we are trying to attract or bring into being, we do so first through a thought.
• Using clear intention and elevated emotions, we create a vibrational match between our energy and an experience that already exists in the quantum field.
• This elevated energy attracts experiences equal to our intention.

The difference is when we are creating the perfect partner, the key is to find someone who shares the same purpose and values.

The polarity of two charges creates a union.

You could be with a person who is completely left-brained and you’re completely right-brained, they could be introverted and you could be extroverted, or you could be outdoorsy and they a homebody. To share the same interests is nice, but when creating a partner, where you want to meet is on a purpose-driven level, whether that purpose is spiritual evolution, a love of nature or travel, a desire for family, and so on. If you have a purpose in mind that is driven by intention, you’re more likely to create someone equal to that purpose and intention. Then even if they are opposite from you in many ways, they compliment you. Two halves make a whole and that’s how great relationships work. Love is the union of polarities.

Creating this vibrational match is a lot like building your house. You need to build a foundation and know what materials you want to use. In this case the materials are the qualities and characteristics of the person you are seeking. Are you seeking someone who is kind, gentle, sweet, strong, decisive, driven, willful? Whatever those qualities are, they are actually experiences you are choosing from the field.

Where many people go wrong is that they start out by creating relationships based on what they have already experienced, and therefore think in terms of what they don’t want; “I don’t want someone who is needy, immature, possessive, etc.” Well guess what? By stating to the universe what you don’t want (which is what you already have), you’re putting that same vibrational match into the field,

What you really want to be saying is what you do want; “I want to experience someone who is mature, wise, and gives me the freedom to become my highest potential.” It’s some people’s inclination to run away from love because in their experience love was painful. That understanding is based on a past experience, which we’d have to agree, is a known. Many of us would rather cling to the known idea that love is painful, draining, etc., and subconsciously be prepared for the worst outcome instead of risking the opportunity of the unknown. If you’re constantly living in the known and creating your future from the past, then you’re not trusting the future you’re creating, and thus you’re not going to have new experiences.

What we have to remember in this great mystery is that putting that thought and vibration of what you do want into the field is like throwing a stone into a pond. From where the stone sinks beneath the surface, a wave moves out in all directions. When that wave reaches the edge of the pond, it bounces back. The thing is, in this metaphorical reality we never really know how big the pond is, which is where trust and surrender comes in.

While waiting for this wave to return to you, your goal should be to raise your own vibration as high as you can, because when you’re in love with who you are and the life you’re creating, you’re going to be less needy and more attractive. When your idea of love is no longer based on dependency, you’re not operating out of limited emotions, which means you’ll naturally bring a greater, nurturing, giving energy to your partner. That’s because you are more whole, and thus you’ll meet your match.

For those of you already in relationships, make the effort to show up as the person you want your partner to be. If you practice being whole, happy, giving, unconditionally loving, and creative (to name a few), you are creating a new relationship with the same person by showing up as a new person. It gives your partner more room to let go of the past, see you from a new perspective, and thus fall more deeply in love with you again—and you with them. That’s the secret to a healthy, long relationship: Falling in love with the same person over and over again.

The alchemy of this work is overcoming ourselves and our limited emotions. If we’re doing it right, creating elevated emotions, and getting out of the way of ourselves, we’re going to find that the right people and things we created by connecting to the field are going to show up when and where we least expect it. And isn’t that fun? That’s a match made in heaven.

Happy Valentine’s Day!