SMF - Just Installed!

Author Topic: Dr. Joe Dispenza's story Of How He Changed and Why It Stops Me Dead In My Tracks  (Read 908 times)

Offline WayneinGeorgia

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 10
    • View Profile
I have read almost half of "Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself". I at first had great expectations that I had finally found the way out of self hatred, hatred of others, suicidal thinking and feeling, resentment of others, attacks on others, self blame, threats towards others, loneliness, and the wish for others to suffer as I have. I was afraid at some point I would hit the dead end wall that I always hit when I find a new teacher, a new book, and new approach to heal negativity, hopelessness, and despair. And now I have reached the point in the book that starts explaining the meditation process. But before that, Dr Dispenza shares his personal story that motivated him to change.

Dr. Dispenza states that he had come to the realization that he could not be happy for being just who he was and that a great deal of his sense of happiness came from his identity as a teacher or spiritual leader. He mentions his appearance in the movie: "The Secret" and of the resulting fame and fortune that followed. At this point he decides he does not want his identity to be based on what he does, who he is in the public eye, or his well being to be defined by his accomplishments. He then talks about how he withdrew from public life for six months so he could focus solely on himself and his transformation which has led him to where he is today.

Here is my issue: Most people needing help and healing such as myself are not in any kind of a position to withdraw from our daily life of suffering and pain to work on change. I mean come on Dr. Joe. Appearing in "The Secret" and being a successful Chiropractor, and best selling author is not exactly "the worst place in the world you could be in." Most people including myself don't have the luxury, the time, much less the money to walk away from our daily lives. I mean you are not talking about your life falling apart, or your wife divorcing you, or your kids are on drugs, or you are contemplating suicide, or you about to become homeless, or you are in prison or a mental hospital. IT IS EASY to make the changes you say you made when you have love and support and financial resources in abundance all around you. It is easy TO DO THE WORK when your life is already doing great except for the feelings of not being your true authentic self.

The wall I have hit is this: Your work is useless for people like me who are so traumatized, filled with hate and resentment, and believe we are beyond help of any kind. This work cannot be integrated by people trapped in rage. They need help. And there just is no help. In order for you or anyone to utilize this work, there has to be self love within to some degree. There has to be a base of some self esteem and and a willingness and more importantly a belief "that they can change no matter how negative a state they are in."  Other words, your work in only for people who "can actually help themselves" and still have people in their life that love and support them. I do not have such a structure and never have.

I fail over and over again such as I mentioned in my study of A Course In Miracles. When it comes down to doing the actual work of changing my beliefs: I CANNOT DO IT AND NEVER HAVE. I cannot keep looking at the evidence that has mounted that I am unlovable person worthy only of death and condemnation. And of course I have hundreds of psychotherapists, counselors, and spiritual teachers who have reacted to me in hate and anger while in my presence. I don't have a center within myself to believe I can change. I am 59 years old and have been on this treadmill of vengeance and hatred for 35 years or more. I don't have a friend, lover, or relationship in the world.

I agree with everything you say in your book. You are the only teacher out there speaking the truth which is: "Positive thinking alone will never be the answer to overcoming the habit of being our self" I have always known that. I hated Wayne Dyer the entire time he was a teacher. I watched him make his millions while pedaling his useless lies. Dr. Dispenza: You are not useless. But your teachings cannot help me because I cannot help myself. Your teachings have to be able to help the Adam Lanza's, the Ted Bundy's, Elliot Rodgers, mass murderers, child molesters, people who hate and resent themselves and others. If your teachings cannot help the people who need them the most or only help people in the Wayne Dyer and Hay House mentality of students, WHAT GOOD ARE YOUR TEACHINGS??  Now I know you will never see these words but maybe your administrator will, but what good will that do?
« Last Edit: January 03, 2017, 08:52:28 AM by WayneinGeorgia »

Offline shawnd.emilyr@gmail.com

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 5
  • hopeful
    • View Profile
This is my first response ever to some one else's post on here, so please cut me some slack if I'm not so eloquent. My first thought after reading your entire post is, cry for help. You obviously do have some small part deep inside of you that does believe, one, you can change, and two, you really want to. If not, you would have never picked up Dr. Joe's book (or got as far as you have), nor would you taken it one step further in reaching out in this discussion forum. I am fairly new to dr.Joe's material....about 4 months into it. I have not been to a workshop (but plan on it soon!) but I do try very hard to maintain my daily dose of meditation and staying completely conscious all day. My point is, I'm no counselor, shrink, therapist, or anything even remotely close to any of those. I do have a loving family and people around me that love and support me, but in no way can take a 6 month break from my life. I have found the biggest thing with Joe's work is the small things can build into bigger things. One small step every day really does make a huge difference....in my attitude, in my life, in my kid's lives. YOU CAN change and believe in yourself. And there IS some small part of you that believes that. And if you don't believe me or yourself, get on you tube and watch all of the testimonials of hundreds of people that have healed themselves of far worse evil then you talk about. Spend half a day just watching those. As long as you, or anyone at that, is alive, there is always hope. Believe me at least, that you would not have gotten this far if something inside of you did not believe that you can be helped and fully healed and loved and most of all, HAPPY. Your writings are a deep cry for help. This is probably the very first thing in your life that you have actually related to and really believed (Dr.Joe's work). I know it was for me. It spoke to me in a way I have never experienced before. Which is why it is the ONE thing that will heal you. Let that small piece inside of you grow, even if just a little, every day. Force yourself to go to a Progressive workshop. We are all capable of change and that doesn't exclude you. You aren't that special:) Keep writing on here. Even if you don't get answers, writing is always therapy. You can and will do this.
Accept and embrace

Offline Calispera

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 472
    • View Profile
    • Changing oneself to change the World
Although I agree with the answer of Emily, and appreciate her message, I will answer in another direction. In fact, I’ve written this message long before I read her message. So, my answer doesn’t take her message into account.

Hi WayneinGeorgia

I liked very much your message. Not because I agree with it (I don’t), but I see a so big force in it. Your determination is huge, your potential as well. And the way you consider yourself seems to be very accurate, and that’s the best start point to go further for the best.
I didn’t appreciate your previous message on the forum. But your explanation on this last message make it all much more understandable: even if I prefer to suggest to you to avoid such aggressiveness against members of the forum. All the more when they express clearly their intention to support and help you.

Your present message shows that you are far enough to be able to take the distance between what your current thoughts and emotions are, and what you are dreaming to become. It means that you are able to leave the first ones in order to go towards another kind of way of thinking.

I don’t have crossed hell as you did, but yet there were very hard times, and still, currently, it's not always a piece of cake. I see obviously similarities with what you describe. That’s why I write all this down. I may be wrong, but if not, I think it’s worth to share that information for you, cause, who knows, you could maybe make something of it.

In fact, my belief is that, as everybody on this planet, your original way of thinking is still intact. But, what you describes seems to mean that series of traumas have led you to be imprisoned by emotional reflexes which are enslaving your way of thinking on a very negative way. And whatever you have tried to do, until now, you couldn’t free your mental from this slavery. And fortunately, you have reached the stage to be conscious of it. The day you’ll be able to dissolve those reflexes, you’ll recover your original state of mind.
In fact, it’s maybe a bit more complex than this. A part of our negative way of thinking comes from traumas, but another part comes from conditioning. And it’s not always easy to differentiate them. So the recovery has to be reached on two levels : reconditioning and dissolving the traumatic aspects. It happens step by step, sometimes quicker, sometimes with stagnation periods. And the stagnation periods turn out, afterwards, to be the most productive for the change.

(PS : I just read your message on the other threat, there :
http://drjoedispenza.com/forum/index.php?topic=922.msg3545;topicseen#new
and it seems to confirm what I understood. I hope I’m not completely misunderstanding.)

You tell us that what Joe Dispenza is proposing cannot work for you. Well, then, based on what Joe Dispenza is bringing in theory, you can try to look for something else that would make possible the change of your mental/emotional negative mess (I hope you accept that I call it like that, it’s not a judgment, just a conclusion from your own words).
That doesn’t mean that what Joe Dispenza is teaching is not worth or not true. It’s only in the practice, presently, not appropriate in your case (or maybe you didn’t try enough).

Joe Dispenza doesn’t pretend (I think) that his method is universal. However, he can tell that it works for a large amount of people. And that’s what is important.
I think that what he tells in his books is universal. But I don’t believe that his techniques are universal. And I make the difference, as until now, I don't succeed to use his techniques.

I will give you series of suggestions, not linked to Joe Dispenza. Usually I avoid to do that so obviously on this forum, because this forum is dedicated to what Joe Dispenza is proposing, and I want to respect his work. But this time I make an exception. But all those techniques, methods, information, are, in my opinion compatible with the theory brought by Joe Dispenza.

Also, I have to mention that I’m not a professional at all. So take what follows only as an opinion. I don’t fear that you could take it blindly, it’s surely not your style. And you even maybe know already all this. But, if there is a possibility that, at least one of those points could give you help, support, or ideas, then I would be glad to have suggested it to you.

1/ First of all, I would propose you to make the rice experiment. It doesn’t ask much time, and doesn’t cost anything, but the effect on the long term can be important.
I’ve written a text explaining it on my website, and it’s translated in English.
http://sechangersoi.be/EN/4EN-Articles/The%20rice%20experiment.htm
This experiment could maybe help you to build a sprout of self confidence. If you become able to observe the power of your thoughts and intentions on external matter, it will force you to become conscious of the power you have on your own thoughts, on your own body (consequently), and on other people. It can reinforce your determination, and give you more hope.
And if you fail, then it’s simply time to do it again, and again, and again, and again.
If you succeed I would suggest to do it again as well, but only with several positive jars. And to keep only those who are staying in good state. It helps to nourish and develop positive thoughts and gratitude.

2/ Another suggestion : As you know that your language is negative, can be destructive and violent, I suggest to privilege writing, and never send a message before having worked on it until you feel serene with the words, in a good emotion, without fearing any flash back (“retour de flamme” in French) from others. It can take 10 days sometimes, or even more, but it’s worth.
Also writing down your negative thoughts (for you only then), can sometimes help hugely to make them leave your mental. You probably know it already, but I prefer to mention it.

3/ As you told, you are already so many years in this mental torture, so I can  expect that you know lots of techniques already. If it was not the case, I would highlight EFT and EMDR as the most efficient I know.
EMDR can really operate miracles, but it has to be used with a therapist. It works directly to dissolve traumas.
EFT can be used alone, but it can require a long experience before having results or before believing in it. So, if you don’t know it, try it, and be persevering, months, years, before declaring that it’s not useful. As your determination is big, I trust you can do it.
You’ll find easily tons of information about both on the net.

4/ I would suggest you to take a look at the following videos from the Gupta programme :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fXqok9sYt8 (look at the session 1 and 2 in whole, it’s worth).
Those references were given here on the forum by another member.
If you can understand that your way of thinking is trapped by your amygdala, and that, if you become able to decondition your amygdala, you will recover your original way of thinking, then you’ll have the key to solve your torture. The Gupta programme is recommended in order to heal from the Chronic Fatigue Syndrom. But I’m deeply convinced that this can help for many pathologic way of thinking. And most of us suffer from this, each one at his own scale.
I think that this method is very compatible with the method of Joe  Dispenza. I guess that Ashok Gupta and Joe Dispenza could surely cooperate very well together. For me it’s very complementary. The theory with Joe Dispenza, another part of the theory with Ashok Gupta, and the techniques from Ashok Gupta.
Specially the “Surrender” meditation from Gupta, makes miracles (like EMDR can do as well).
An advantage : this method is democratic (140 euros for a phenomenal amount of information and techniques). Gupta is trying presently to launch an academic research on it in California, in order to make it recognized in the medical area, in order to make possible reimbursement by social security for his programme.

I have to acknowledge that a lot of the explanations of Ashok Gupta gave me the impression that this person knew me and understood me so well; better than anyone ever understood me in my life. Even if I never met him ;) His understanding of how our thoughts are working is prodigious.

5/ Do you know the muscle testing?
https://www.onetruth.ca/exercises-head/muscle-testing
This is a genius way to bypass your negative reactions. When you desire to go in one direction, but you doubt that it’s a negative reflex and that it can harm you or harm someone else; the muscle testing can confirm or disconfirm what you would have done at first sight.
It’s also a technique to learn on the long term, but it really can prevent us to do negative actions.
it teaches us that there is a part of us which is much more mature than our reflexes and our thoughts.

6/ Another suggestion : have you already tried the non-violent communication? There are maybe interesting things to learn in this area.

7/ Any kind of meditation can help you on the long term. But, classic meditation works on a very long term. And when we are imprisoned by our emotions and thoughts, it’s terribly difficult to meditate correctly. It can even worsen our condition. It’s better to privilege guided meditation.

8/ Try to listen as often as possible to soft music that touches you. Music that you like a lot and that lighten your mind. Try to avoid, most of the time, heavy metal, grunge, punk music and others of this kind. I like in fact those musics, but when we are in negative patterns they really don’t help to escape negative thoughts.

9/ Are you making some sport, yoga? Are you walking often? Movement can lighten the mind as well.

10/ Avoid stress, sugar and sweet food like the plague. They are the best motor for violent emotions, and then for negativity.

11/ If you have the time to read, I would suggest you several titles that have helped me a lot :
“You are the placebo”, from Joe Dispenza
“The Road Less Traveled”, from Scott Peck
“The power of now”, from Eckart Tolle, especially the chapter on “the pain body”
“Waking the tiger, healing trauma”, from Peter A. Levine
“The body keeps the score – Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma” by Bessel van der Kolk
And a little powerful one about “ho’ oponopono” :
“The easiest way” from Mabel Katz

I’m myself someone who is very alone, no love, no support, except from professionals, and with my old mother who is not able anymore to make a little conversation. I only can count on myself. And I was incredibly negative some years ago (I’m still not totally positive, and I still work on it – and I acknowledge that your condition seems to be more difficult than mine). So, I know it’s possible to do the work. You can go on looking for the techniques that fits you. There is not “one” right technique. But you can build your own toolkit which would make possible to choose the technique according to the problem met.

I see a so big force and determination in what you tell on your message. It makes me think that, if you go on searching, you will ineluctably find what fits you. And, if you achieve a profound transformation of your mental state; then your force, your knowledge of yourself, your experience, your understanding of the processes you will have crossed; could make of you a resource person for others.

Keep hoping, you are far enough in the comprehension of yourself to be able to make it happen.
At one point you will begin to see that the half empty glass is beginning to look like a half full glass. (may be you are already at that point, or not far from it). And from that moment, the glass will begin to fill up.

And what you’ll do can serve others by means of the morphic fields. This is still a theory, but it makes so much sense to my eyes, so that it’s difficult to believe that it could be wrong.
I give you a link to another text that I’ve published on my website on this subject, and translated it in English as well.
http://sechangersoi.be/EN/4EN-Articles/Sheldrake%20EN.htm
I intentionally avoid generally to make reference to my website on the forum, but in this case, I feel it really appropriate.

And just two more things :
Quote
An Old Cherokee Tale of Two Wolves

One evening an old Cherokee Indian told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, ‘My son, the battle is between two ‘wolves’ inside us all.One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.’

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: ‘Which wolf wins?’

The old Cherokee simply replied, ‘The one you feed.’

Quote
Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

Portia Nelson

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost ... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter 2

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter 3

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in ... it's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter 4

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter 5

I walk down another street.

I’m presently at chapter 3 and 4, depending on the periods. The only difference with the story : it’s not my fault, and I do my best. And sometimes, I perceive into the far, chapter 5 coming in my direction.

Offline WayneinGeorgia

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 10
    • View Profile
Response to Shawnd.Emily:  I did in fact look at several testimonials on You Tube from people claiming miracles and resolutions to their pain and suffering as you suggested. I plan to look at more. HOWEVER! There was not one testimonial as you say of people "who overcome far worse evils." Every testimonial had to do with well adjusted people, financially stable people who were only dealing with cancer, or internal pain, or some bodily condition "just as I expected." I will continue to look but I won't hold my breath.

There was this one short interview of about 5 minutes where Dr. Dispenza was asked to comment on people who are sad, depressed, angry, and resentful. And Dr. Dispenza totally botched it and was completely thrown off balance by the interviewer. Here is the you tube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6P7XC_4i3rI&list=FL-gL1UxhPOXRxUiPAn0JARQ&index=2

Dr. Dispenza completely avoided the question and actually criticized those who hold resentment blaming them telling them that they harm only themselves. I  left a comment stating that I bet the victims of the Sandy Hook massacre and their families "would disagree that those who hold rage and anger only hurt themselves."

It appears at this point that Dr. Dispenza as all New Age teachers only focus on those with Cancer or the endless list of other bodily ills without realizing that people who get cancer ARE FULL OF RAGE AND ANGER AND THAT IS WHAT BROUGHT THE CANCER TO THEM. But because it shows up as a physical condition they get sympathy and understanding from everyone in the world. But people with mental disorders such as myself only get condemnation, blame, and attack.

But, I will keep looking at more testimonials.  Thank you for your comment. At least I don't feel as much anger or negative reaction to your comment as I have others. Oh, and one more thing. In your previous post you said there were people giving testimonials who had "overcome far worse evils than what I speak of." Just a question for you. What "far worse evils" are you referring to? I sure did not see them during the testimonials. What far worse evil is there that out ranks being filled with self hatred, rage, and the desire for others to suffer loss, total isolation from human touch, contact, and relationship to others, and those who eventually turn into mass murders such as displayed by Adam Lanza and Elliot Rodgers? If you know of far worse evils, then please let me know.  Thanks again for your comment.
« Last Edit: January 06, 2017, 07:25:48 AM by WayneinGeorgia »

Offline snaka

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 2
    • View Profile
Wishing peace to WayneinGeorgia-

I was quite motivated to give my testimonial, after reading the discussion above. I am not fond of having to tell my story, but I thought that it was necessary...

personal testimonial:

-I've had most of the emotions that were mentioned above (and more)
-diagnosed with chronic complex PTSD
-did not have pleasant childhood
-found my sister (14) after suicide (horrific sight/trauma)
-lost another relative at a young age
-lost house and all contents in hurricane

I went to many therapists over the years.  They could only offer sympathy, which was not helpful.  Talking repeatedly about my childhood and traumas only served to keep me locked in anger/guilt and other negative emotional states.

Dr. Joe's information (and a massive amount of work from me) has changed me into a completely new person.  At one time, I had not thought that it was possible to reach this place of peace and the new Being that I've become.

I do wish you that Peace...

Offline WayneinGeorgia

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 10
    • View Profile
In response to Calispera and Dareksk: I am not able at this moment to respond to your recent posts but will do so when I feel better. I NEED TO CORRECT SOMETHING: I am not a "She" as the two of you have referred to me as. I am not offended. But I am a Man not a woman posting and commenting in this Forum. My first name is Wayne. I thought putting WayneinGeorgia as my profile name would allow people to know I am male and not female. Not a real big deal, but it needs to be corrected.  Thank You.

Offline reconrad

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 1
    • View Profile
Perhaps the answer has been staring at you the whole time Wayne. You've probably skimmed over it. You're thinking from your critical analytical mind. I don't know much about Dispenza to be honest. I have just recently started observing his testimonies, claims, methods and books. That said, I can see from an initial observation that you're not applying one the key components of his advice. You're thinking from an analytical mindset. You don't appear to be practicing the mediation/prayer exercises properly. In order to successfully address the negative mindset that you have, you have to practice observing it from outside of your analytical mindset. Essentially the mediation techniques state that you must step outside of your conscious layer of thinking, and into your subconscious thinking with the practiced forethought that you must clear your mind to become nothing, no-one (not be confused with a negative connotation either, for this is merely an exercise to clear the mind and to step outside of yourself). Naturally your subconscious mind is housing all of the programming from your conscious analytical mind so it must first be cleared by the practice of envisioning and being who you'd like and want to be. Depending on the extent of your negative analytical programming, this will determine how long and how deep you'll need to practice thinking outside of this trained conscious mindset.
Naturally if you're unwilling to perform this commitment, then you're skipping a critical component to wanting to change. As a Christian for 40 years, everything I research, practice and commit to goes through what I already know, and often times converted to something more applicable to my understanding of reality. My position is that one shouldn't throw the baby out with the bath water. All that which is good is from God, but the key is to knowing if something is really good, or not. And the only reason I am bringing this to your attention is due to the possibility that there is a small part of yourself that does want to change and is ready to have the analytical part of your mind to finally take a break from ruling your life. 

Offline palani

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 18
    • View Profile
To Reconrad: Maybe the "Answer For You" is too keep your mouth closed and go sit in a church somewhere with your bible thumping friends.
Illuminating.  Thank you for the example that shows there must be a desire to change for change to occur.  Reminds me of James Allen (As A Man Thinketh) when he states that the law of your being controls your life and this is a law that does not err.